Oops!

In case somebody out there has not seen this highlight yet, here's the clip of the Canadian Junior champs during the trophy celebration last week. I love the reaction of the crowd after it happens......they obviously won the championship on the road!

A Question of Utmost Importance!

Does anyone remember that post I made last year at some point when I regaled everyone with my adventures through Pennsylvania....going to Steeler games and trying to eat burgers the size of a Volvo? Well, my friend Tony and I have had an ongoing disagreement about something that just hasn't sat well with me since those trips. The disagreement centers around a restaurant chain that is centered in PA and can also be found in parts of West Virginia and Ohio. As you can see, it calls itself Eat'n Park!

So here's the disagreement. Tony claims that there is absolutely nothing wrong with the name of the restaurant. I claim there is a TON wrong with the name. In fact, I think it's so wrong, that I can't even remember what Tony's reasoning was for his satisfaction with the name, seeing as how there really can't be a legitimate reason to like it except for the explicit fact of pissing me off! He can leave a comment backing up his claim, but I'll go ahead and explain my qualms and you, the readers, can simply leave a comment supporting my claim and we'll move on! How's that sound?

I have two main problems with it. First off, the apostrophe within Eat'n Park seems either misplaced, or misused. What letter(s) is the apostrophe replacing? It would appear that Eat'n is one word, but let's assume Eat'n is short for Eating. Then the apostrophe would be replacing the letter I. But what about the 'g'? There's no apostrophe for it! So is Eat'n short for the already abbreviated word Eatin'? If so, that's horrible! You've replaced the 'i' with an apostrophe and eliminated the other one!

Even though it appears that Eat'n is one word, I claim that it makes WAY more sense to say its two separate words: "eat" and "and". That would mean the name, without any apostrophes, would be read as Eat and Park! Makes sense, right? Well, not really since there should also be an apostrophe at the end of Eat'n (as in Eat'n'), because that 'd' seems to have vanished with no replacement. However, I still stand behind my claim that the whole name, strung out, reads Eat and Park. Why? Because what the hell is an Eating Park? Never, in my entire life, have I ever heard a family restaurant referred to as a "park"! I've looked up the word "restaurant" at thesaurus.com and have found the following synonyms for it:

automat, barbecue, beanery, bistro, brasserie, cafe, cafeteria, canteen, chophouse, diner, eatery, inn, luncheonette, pizzeria, porterhouse, rathskeller, rotisserie, steakhouse, tavern, tearoom, trattoria

See, not a "park" to be found! So the Eat'n Park must be short for Eat and Park, "eat" being what humans do with food, and "park" being what humans do with their vehicles in the parking lot before entering said brasserie!

So that brings me to the second big problem I have with the name. The damn words are backwards!!!!! Eat and Park??? NO! Park and Eat! How can you possibly sit down and enjoy your meal before you've parked your car? First you park, then you eat. It's that simple.

The franchise began in South Hills of Pittsburgh in 1949, with the business model that customers could drive their car and park at the restaurant, while being waited on by waitresses on rollerskates.

That excerpt is taken from wikipedia, and pretty much proves my point. Even their business model pointed out that the car must be parked before being waited on.

Here you can see a picture of the outside of an Eat'n Park restaurant. As you can see, there are several vehicles parked in the restaurant's parking lot. In a leap of faith, I am assuming that the reason the vehicles are empty is that their occupants have proceeded into the restaurant (after parking their cars) and are enjoying a piping hot meal made by dedicated cooks and served by the happy wait staff.

Okay, now here you can see several patrons of an Eat'n Park sitting down and enjoying their meals, while kept company by the friendly Eat'n Park waitress. I'd like to point out that the diners seem to be rather content and are NOT currently in a moving vehicle. My hypothesis is that their mode of transportation is parked outside in the parking lot, which occurred before they entered and sat down at their table.


Now I'm getting off the subject just a tad, but this is a logo from an establishment located in England of all places. Now I realize that it could be possible to go bowling at their place before eating, but who wants to bowl on an empty stomach? I posted the pic mostly to illustrate the correct use of BOTH apostrophes!

By the way, I've mentioned this argument to Danielle once (who is from Pittsburgh), but she just shook her head, seemed disgusted, and told me that I had way too much time on my hands! However, I think we're far enough into the relationship at this point that I can read her subtle little nuances and unspoken words and I know that what she really meant is that she's very proud of me for being so observant and insightful. The way she stroked that space between her eyes like she had a headache was a dead giveaway!

So I ask everyone who is reading this to please take one moment out of your day and respond in the comments section saying that I'm 100% correct in my argument and that Tony is simply way off-base with his! It would go a long way in putting this bitter feud behind us, and let us go on with our lives while the wounds heal over.

Song Revisited

For my friend Matt's benefit, as well as anyone else, I'll post two more versions of Fat Old Sun by David Gilmour and Pink Floyd.

Here is the studio album version from a clip on youtube.



And here is an extended live version from one of my boots. It might take a while to load.

Early '70s live concert version

The Most Random Blog Post EVER!

I got off of work at 5am this morning, after one hour of voluntary overtime. Unlike Mikey, I find it hard to spike a $700 night these days, so I gotta keep grinding away on the Strip.

While driving home and taking in the beautiful sunrise over the mountains to the east, I wondered how I would spend the rest of my "evening". I remembered that I had DVR'd the NASCAR Sprint Cup race the night before and I somehow kept from finding out the results during 9 hours of work. So I decided that I'd enjoy my Memorial Day weekend night/morning by watching the race, accompanied by a 12 pack of Corona and one 33 cent lime. So I stopped by the store on the way home and picked up the necessary supplies and came home to a very happy Mikey, who was now over $700 richer thanks to a great night at work! I guess I don't need to worry about him coming up with his half of the rent for our last month in the man-cave!!!

I made him even more happier by filling him on some shockingly unknown aspects of my life, and I also gave him two of my Coronas in a can.....poured into a pint glass with a lime wedge. We preceded to watch the NASCAR race, but he puttered out around lap 100, leaving me to root for my favorite driver (Bobby Labonte) by myself.

Well, good ole Bobby made a great run near the end of the race (coming back from two laps down) and finished 11th. Not bad, but it could have been a whole lot better if he'd taken two tires during the 2nd to last pit stop instead of 4. 4 tires just wasn't warranted in that situation, and I bet his crew chief is kicking himself this morning for making that call.

Anyway, as you could probably guess, the NASCAR race (which was 600 miles long, the longest race of the year) took a lot out of me. The combination of 9 hours of work and about 9 Coronas in a can accompanied by several lime wedges has made me pretty loopy as of 10:40am, which is when I'm making this blog post.

So in this state of mind, I was tempted to do something that pretty much every blogger has done in the past. That is make a top ten list. My top ten list would encompass the top ten rock guitarists of all-time. However, I am just at the point where I could probably real off ten really good musicians, but I also am aware that my state-of-mind would hinder me from making a list that could be interpreted as legitimate. So I will wait until a later time to make my list. However, I will wet your whistle a little by informing you that my top ten list will definitely include both David Gilmour and Steve Howe. That only leaves 8 remaining spots in my coveted top ten. Jimmi, Eric, Jeff,.....are you concerned????

So I got on the internet after watching the race (and humming the fight song for Michigan State for no apparent reason) and found out something completely shocking to me. I thought the guy who played Weird Al Yankovick's sidekick in the move UHF was Andrew McCarthy. However, come to find out, it was some little known character actor named David Bowe. What's up with that!!?? He's the one I think of when I am tempted to make a Twinkie Weiner Sandwich, not Weird Al himself.

Holy crap! I just thought of something. I know very well that Danielle (it just took me 4 minutes to figure out how to spell my own girlfriend's first name correctly) reads my blog on a regular basis. But what if she has told her parents about my blog. I never realized that that could be a possibility! Hello Mr. and Mrs. girlfriend's last name (yes, I know her last name but will not reveal it to the internet world, but I'll be damned if I remember both of her parent's first names). I've only met her parents twice, and the 2nd time was at 12 midnight (my midnight) on Mother's Day when I was still half-asleep and wondering how 4 guys from New Zealand made it from the Strip to a nondescript golf course in Anthem!

To read more about the capital of Nebraska, please visit this web site:

The capital of Nebraska is Lincoln!

Is it possible to get another 6-8 months out of my work shoes by simply buying insoles, new shoe strings and Kiwi "liquid shine"? I hope so! Those damn Rockports have served me well since I broke in at Nevada Palace, but they cost over $100 and they're becoming really rough around the edges!!

Believe it or not, I visited my very first strip club in Vegas the other night during a bachelor's party. I will not divulge which gentlemen's establishment it was, but I will say that I was a very good boy and spent less than $50 during the 3 hours that we were there. I would like to add that I am very concerned about the amount of tattoos found on the average Las Vegas professional dancer. It really doesn't do anything for me! Yet, the "tramp stamp" seems to be pretty much a requirement these days to work in a strip club, and some of the tattoos are WAY over the top, like those that include a dragon wrapping itself around the entirety of a women's leg. I mean, c'mon! That's just trying way too hard in my book! Yuck!!

Okay, I really need to get to bed now. It's almost noon, and after all , it IS a work-night/morning/almost afternoon. I work the 8pm-4am shift again tonight. Hopefully I'm not on the Big Six Wheel again like last night! By the way, I actually got my very first tip on the Big Six Wheel last night. I also had a guy who came up to the table asking if he could "change up" a black chip into red chips so that he could play. The "black chip" was a chip that simply said "official tournament play" on it and was obviously something he either bought off of ebay for 50 cents or found in a box of Sugar Smacks! I told him he could play the chip, but if he won, it would merely enroll him into a chance to win a free entry into the Jelly-of-the-Month club.

Here is a nice picture of the great English comedic actor, Benny Hill!

Nut Loaf

During my first year of college, a couple friends of mine spent WAY too long putting together this 5 second gem! It's what you get when you combine Dr. Dre with Meatloaf!

ANYNUTS2.WAV

David Gilmour - Fat Old Sun

Can 62 year-old fogies still rock? You bet they can!!!

While out shopping yesterday, I stopped by Best Buy and picked up the Remember That Night DVD, David Gilmour's concert from the Royal Albert Hall at some point in 2006. So I was watching it last night in the living room in 5.1 goodness when Mikey came home early, so he was "forced" to watch it as well. Now usually when I'm watching anything Pink Floyd, it takes all of his willpower to keep from mentioning hippies or the fact that he can't believe I don't smoke weed.

However, because Mikey has a background with playing guitar, he obviously knows a good thing when he sees/hears it. In my biased opinion, David Gilmour HAS to be one of the top 10 greatest guitarists in rock history. After the Fat Old Sun was over, Mikey mentioned how the guitar solo was one of the best that he's ever seen, which is insanely high praise for someone who really isn't into the Floyd that much. So please enjoy this clip of a song that was written and first performed live in 1970 (four years before I was born) and has completely stood the test of time! The guitar solo that Mikey liked so much begins around the 3:24 mark, but I encourage you to check out the entire clip if you have the time.



If you liked this, there's PLENTY more on the DVD! It's available on regular dvd and also blu-ray.

Amazon Link

Monkies, Ants, Aliens, Russians....what's not to love?

Danielle and I saw the Indiana Jones movie last night down at Green Valley Ranch. I won't pretend to know how to write a complete movie review like the experts (such as Roger Ebert and Javier), but I wanted to give you my initial reaction to the movie before you go out to see it yourself. Both Danielle and I had heard about the mixed reviews for the movie before seeing it, so I figured it would probably be decent entertainment for 90 minutes, which is exactly what it was and nothing more. I really doubt if I'll go out of my way to rent it on DVD or try to see it anytime down the road, but I'm not completely unhappy with it.

I haven't seen any of the first three Indy movies in years, so I might be way off-base in saying that I don't remember any of the first three being completely unbelievable and over-the-top like what I saw last night. Yes, I do recall some of the crazy crap in the first three (like some dude watching his own heart beat after it getting ripped out of him), but I also remember that stuff working within the movie. Last night just seemed to be one insane scene after another just for the sake of jamming them all down the viewer's throats.

At many points throughout the movie I just expected the screen to pause just as Indy and his clan were about to crest a waterfall the size of Niagra, and then Waylon Jennings' voice comes on with a "Now can you believe the Duke Boys done got themselves into this crazy predicament? I don't know how they're gonna get outa this bucket of syrup!"

The first time I quietly uttered "this is Big Brown horse crap" to myself was when, somehow, a dude was swinging from jungle rope vines and actually keeping up with a car chase that was probably pushing 70mph! What?!?! I also did not care one bit for John Hurts' character, who was supposed to be a decrepit old crazy man, but somehow kept up with all of the characters during the chase scenes and aforementioned waterfall recoveries!

Oh well, like I said, it was good entertainment. But if you're a devoted fan of the first three movies and expect the same from this, you might be a bit disappointed.

Much To-Do About Nothin'

Well, I just wrapped up my 8th day in the casino out of the last 9. For some reason they broke apart my days off this week so that I had Saturday and Thursday off (which is today). But what's a little weirder is that the work-week starts on Fridays, and I have Friday off as well, so I actually have a 2-day weekend now......just the tail end of one week and the beginning of the next. Does that make sense?

So what does a guy do in Las Vegas with two days off? How about going on a 24 hour gambling bender at the craps table? Painting the town red with copious amounts of showgirl? Hittin' a microbrew for happy hour and then struttin' my stuff at a club or "gentleman's establishment"?

Nope. Nope. Nope.

I got off work at 5am, and here's my to-do list before I will allow myself to go home and go to sleep:
- car appointment for oil change and tire rotation
- haircut
- go to Wal*Mart and buy a mini-filing cabinet and a belt
- go to the mall for a new pair of jeans, shorts and possibly a new pair of shoes (doubtful on the shoes)
- do 2 loads of laundry and clean my damn computer desk and nightstand off!

Real exciting stuff, eh?

As far as work goes, my last two nights were spent on the dice table. I will just mention one thing about working dice on the Strip (as compared to the off-strip flea circuses)......if a table EVER has a 45 minute roll......PRESS YOUR F*****G BETS!!!!! I kid you not, there have been rolls of at least 45 minutes in each of the past two nights, and at the end of those monster rolls, I still had nothing but $5 and $6 place bets on my end. Tourists seem very happy to color-up after winning $300 when they could have actually won 5 grand if they knew what they were doing.

Not pressing during those rolls does two things that are a detriment to the dealers. First off, winners tip. If you win more, you'll tip more. So we WANT you to win! Secondly, after about 20 minutes, it becomes a freakin' pain in my royal ass to try to keep 8 tourists on my side from completely taking away all of the red and blue ($5 and $1) chips in the bankroll (when they should be working on taking all of my green)! So I'm working my ass off, yelling over the loud music and screaming players to drop me $18 every single time their $6 place bet on the six or eight hits so I can give them 1 green chip instead of 1 red chip and 2 blue chips. For the love of god, at the very least press your bets up to $25 and $30 on the place bets so we don't need to worry about those pesky blue chips getting in the way!

Oh, and one other thing happened last night that about made me go bonkers. Some dude in spot one on my side happened to hit a prop bet that paid him $1,250! I'll give you exactly ONE guess as to how much he dropped the dealers. I'm sure you know he didn't give us a dime! But here's the absolute worst kick in the groin that he could have done. Because he was too busy high-fiving his buddies and carrying on about winning the loot, he forgot to make a pass-line bet during the next come-out roll. The roll happened to be a seven, he got back to his spot right after the roll, and then proceeded to chew me out (by name and everything) for not getting his attention and reminding him to make a bet! HOLY S**T I was livid, as was the guy on stick when he heard this. The exact words out of my mouth were a very stern "You just won $1200 and now you're blaming me for losing out on another five bucks!? I'm not your babysitter dude, and trust me, I'm not losing any sleep tonight over your five bucks!". From that moment on, he became public enemy #1 for the rest of the night as he played. Any drunkin' profanity out of his mouth drew the wrath of myself and the supervisor. Any bet that was even close to hitting the felt as the dice moved was no-bet. After a while, he seemed to get somewhat of a clue and started making whopping $1 hard-eight bets for us, but by then it was way too late.

Well, at least I have two days to unwind at this point. Actually, it might be three days since I'm on-call for Saturday night. I'm assuming they'll call me since its a holiday weekend, but as 0f yet, I've never actually been called in on my on-call days.

Let There Be Light

One thing that I've noticed now that I've worked the late swing shift for a few weeks now is how early the sun starts to make an appearance in the morning. I worked the 8pm-4am shift last night and as I was driving home, I began to see the very first lightening in the eastern sky over the mountains. The time was 4:30am. I don't know what the official sunrise time is these days, but I do know its pretty damn light out around 5:30am. It makes sense though, since Vegas is on the very eastern edge of the Pacific time zone (I think the cutoff is the Arizona border, which is basically the Hoover Dam). Since Vegas is on the eastern edge of the time zone, it sees the sun early than the coast, and thus, the sunset is always a little before the California cities.

The other oddity of this shift is trying to figure out exactly when I can "get stuff done." There have been numerous times that I've gotten home from work, waited around until 9am for the bank to open, do my business, and then go to bed. I've been needing to do a little shopping for weeks now (new jeans, belt, maybe some shoes), but of course the stores/malls are open at the exact same times that I'm either in bed, or going to work at night. If anyone knows of a 24 hour JC Penney around here, let me know.

The new sleep schedule has also bitten a couple times, even during my "weekend". On Mother's Day, I met up with Danielle's parents for a brunch, which was around noon. Noon might as well be midnight as far as I'm concerned. The brunch occurred right in the middle of when I'd normally be asleep, so I spent the rest of the day FORCING myself to stay awake so that I wouldn't mess up the sleep for the next night's shift. It wasn't a very fun weekend (except for Rush, which kicked ass).

I know I'm preaching to the choir for some folks who work nights and weird shifts (I'm looking in your general direction ER doc!), but it can get really annoying when you're trying to set up an appointment to have your car worked on and you have to explain to them that 1pm won't work because I'll be in bed! It also sucks when a hockey game comes on at 5pm, and you miss most of it because you hit the snooze button one too many times!

Oh well, I've come to the definite conclusion that all three shifts here in Vegas have their pros and cons. Swing shift fits me because I'm naturally a night owl anyway, and the traffic on my commute isn't bad, especially at 5am! Day shift is nice, but with the 3 hour time difference, most of the major sporting events on TV are a forgone conclusion by the time I get off work. Graveyard actually gave me the most flexibility. I'd get out of work at 11am and be able to run any chores that I needed. I'd also get a nightlife if I wanted before going to work at 3am. The downside, of course, is that most of the time I'd be going to bed at 5pm in the early evening, which just never felt right.

I did put in a transfer request for day shift, but I'm not sure how long I'd have to wait for it. I'd write more, but its already 10:30am and MUCH past my bedtime. Have a great night everyone!

No News

Nothing much going on around here, so please just enjoy this video of a guy playing the theme song to Mario Brothers while blindfolded!

Comfortably Numb on a Saturday Morning

I got home from work around 4:45am and planned on going to bed right away in hopes of catching the Wings game at 10:30, Vegas time. Before I went to bed, I wanted to check my email and approve any blog comments. For some unknown reason, I decided to check out what wikipedia had to say about Alex Lifeson of Rush (with the concert still ringing in my head from last week). At that point......it was on! No beddy bye time for me. After checking out Alex's info, for yet another unknown reason, I decided to read up on just about anything Syd Barrett related. Then it was on to youtube for some Syd (Roger) Barrett stuff, and then about 3 hours of browsing through some more Floyd stuff. My link off to the side named "the great time waster" is a youtube link, for obvious reasons.

Well, in case anyone is in a lethargic mood on a lazy Saturday/Sunday and wants to chill out with some pretty rare Floyd tunes that I found on youtube, here are a couple. The first is an amazing live video version of Carefull With That Axe, Eugene circa 1972. The second is an acoustic version of the final part of Echoes, the video being an easter egg on David Gilmour's live DVD from 2007 (which I have inexplicably not purchased yet).

Enjoy!

O-H-I-O

My girlfriend seems mildly annoyed when I open a bottle of beer and the opener treats us to the tune of the Buckeye Battle Cry. My roommate seems annoyed that amongst all of his books, booze bottles and cigar boxes in the common area, a couple tastefully framed pictures of two of college football's great coaches should appear.

Well, I'd just like to point out that my fanaticism doesn't even come close to that of my friend, Tony, back in Ohio. Here are some pics of his computer room that I took when I was back in Sandusky a few weeks ago. Ebay must LOVE him!!!

Yet another game under the belt

It seems the new job has provided a little blog fodder lately, mostly because I've had to learn so many new games/procedures within the past 2 weeks its made my head spin! The place is just completely full of weird carnival games, blackjack variations, automatic card shufflers, etc. etc. And if you want sucker side bets, we've got 'em!! When I look at the road map and see my string, I never feel completely comfortable yet even if it says blackjack, because it could be one of many different variations. Let me try to name off the blackjacks only:

-single deck with lucky lady side bet
-double deck with lucky lady side bet
-6 deck shoe with lucky lady side bet
-8 deck shoe with lucky lady side bet
-8 deck shoe with dealer's option (where the player bets on the dealer's hand)
-any deck(s) with the winner's option (where the player can choose to win half their bet if their first two cards equal 20 and the dealer shows a ten value card up (after checking for blackjack)

The shoe games may or may not have an automatic card shuffler (which ALWAYS breaks) and the shuffle procedures between single, double, 6-deck, 8-deck, no machine, machine, etc. are ALL different! In other words, I just can't look at the dealer road map before the shift and know what type of blackjack game I'm getting. Oh, and you can split cards on all blackjack games, but for some reason you can not double down after splitting on the double-deck games, but you CAN double after splitting on the single deck and shoe games. Also, did you notice that there are a bunch of tables with the lucky lady side bets up there. Guess what, there are two different payout tables associated with the lucky ladies floating around, so I always have to look at the payout schedule whenever I step into a table (and usually promptly forget it once the first damn hand is dealt).

Now let's try to real off ALL of the games in the joint, not including blackjack:

-craps
-roulette
-let it die
-3-card poker
-bonus hold'em
-3-5-7 poker
-big six wheel
-casino war

I think that's it. My place used to have pai gow poker and mini-pai gow about 5 or 6 weeks ago, but both games were taken out. I believe they were axed due to the lack of dealers that knew how to deal them. It's too bad because I was just starting to get proficient in pai gow when I was laid off at the old place in Henderson and I kind of enjoyed dealing that game! For the record, the only game that I do NOT deal is roulette, but I'm sure they'll expect me to learn that as well down the road.

The last one on that list was casino war, which I dealt for the first time 2 nights ago. When I stepped in, I had the preconception of it being brutal, much along the same lines as Let it Ride and the Big Six Wheel. However, it really wasn't that bad. It seems the people that play War are pretty fun and spirited most of the time, and can actually grasp the simple concept of the game. And of course they should! It's basically the same damn game you played as a kid growing up. I deal you a card and I deal myself a card. If your card is bigger, I pay you even money. If my card is bigger, I take your money. If we tie, THEN IT IS WAR!!!!! That's where the big house edge comes into play. When there's a tie, I'll put out an amount equal to your bet (kind of like pre-paying) and you'll take that money if you win the battle. However, to go to war, you must also put out an amount equal to your original bet. So if you're keeping track, you now have 2 bets out there in the circle and I've only put one out for you to take if you win. 2 bets to win 1 bet. If you think that creates a hefty house edge, you're right.

One caveat is that if we tie AGAIN during the war, you win that bet I've pre-paid you plus a bonus bet, also equal to the original. One nice thing about this game is that, like the Big Six Wheel, the War table is off on its own like a little island within the casino. So there are never any floor sups roaming around. That kind of gives me free reign to be a little more edgy or weirder than normal, which I've tended to be since I escaped the vengeful grasp of Boulder Highway! The other nice thing about the game is that I can kind of pick the speed that the table goes at. As you can probably guess, the potential speed of the game can make Speedy Gonzales look like a mere Regular Gonzalez. It's just one card to each player and boom, one card to me. Take the losers and pay the winners, bada bing! I could literally deal one hand every 10 seconds if the players were quick enough to make their bets.

If the table is cool and we're having fun, I'll tend to slow down a little and chat it up with everyone. If a couple chain-smokers sit down and start acting like the douchebags over on LIR, then I'll shut up and deal at Ludicrous Speed (and probably go plaid).



All-in-all, War wasn't as bad as I expected. One aspect of it was that there tended to be way more "hit and runs" than on the other games. This is where some random dude will just come up to the table and plop down like a hundred bucks on one hand of war! The couple times it happened the other night, I won both times. And both times, the dude would put yet another hundy out there, and lose that one as well. War has the only continuous shuffle machine in the entire place, so I do not have to shuffle or anything. I just change the hundy into 4 green, he places them into the circle, we do battle and I take his money. There you have it, $200 gone in the blink of an eye (less than 30 seconds). I can just see him getting back to his buddies in the hotel room. "Yea man, I lost $200 at the craps table man! The table just went cold and I couldn't hit anything." "Oh yea man, well I lost $200 at the War table in less than 30 seconds! I can't believe my jack got beat by his queen both times! It sucked man!" Which story sounds a little more dignified?

Watch Out Nick!!

This is just a picture that I took through the window of Madame Toussaud's wax museum at the Venetian the other morning around 6am. It appears that Nicholas Cage only has seconds to live!

Why was I snooping around the Strip at 6am? That's one thing that SUCKS about working swing shift. I needed a replacement swipe-in badge and I could only get a new one from the human resources department. I worked until 5am, the office didn't open 'till 8am. So I was stuck roaming the Strip for a couple of hours, gawking at wax statues and watching the joggers go by.

Thanks

A quick "thank you" to Wildcat Fan for sending me the 2-for-1 coupon to the 2nd City show at the Flamingo! We'll probably use it this Saturday night for the 2nd City "scriptless show", which is comprised of all improvisational sketches, not the scripted sketches like in the regular show. It should be a blast!

Thanks man!

Canada's Loudest Band

Well, I'm back from the Rush concert on Saturday night and my ears are still ringing! They definitely took it up to 11 tonight as it was easily the loudest concert I've ever attended! As far as concerts go, I'd have to put it down the ladder a bit behind the likes of Waters, the Who and Yes, but that doesn't mean they didn't rock my ass off! I still can't get past the fact that these guys are in their mid-fifties and can still put on a show like this one! The individual talent on their specific instruments is just amazing. The show started around 8:10pm and ended around 11:20pm, with a 10-15 minute break.

As I mentioned in my other post, I'm definitely not a Rush officionado and haven't really actively listened to many of their songs with the exception of those played (and overplayed) on classic rock radio stations. In fact, I think I was referring to "Gene Geddy" all night for some reason when talking with Danielle when the his actual name, of course, is Geddy Lee! However, I did go in with the knowledge that Neil Peart may be the best rock drummer in the history of the world and his drum solo tonight was a thing of beauty (though I could have used just a little more cowbell). I doubt if I'll ever hear a better drum solo, live or otherwise, for the rest of my life! It was that good!! His equipment was awesome, rotating a full 180 degrees numerous time throughout the performance to give him access to every little toy he had on that thing.

The big screens were also very cool. Some of the video sequences shown included cameo appearances from the McKenzie Brothers, Jerry Stiller and the South Park cartoon kids, with Cartman making up his own lyrics for Tom Sawyer mistaking him for Huckleberry Finn.

Our seats were supposed to be up near the nosebleeders stage left, but since Danielle had worked as an usher in years past and knew someone there, we got an upgrade to a great section stage right (as you can see in the pics). That once again proves that when in Vegas, its all about who you know!

Here's a few random pictures of the night. As I've mentioned before, I don't own a digital camera. Even though my camera phone takes pretty decent pics, the sound quality of the videos severely lacks. I'll put a few videos on following the pics for what they're worth, but you might want to turn your volume way down before watching them. It was SO LOUD that any decent quality out of my phone was next to impossible. However, some of the videos show the very nice lasers and light effects, and I think I have a couple vids of Neil in the middle of his solo.

Edited to add: It seems the first four vids of Neil in his solo aren't too bad, as well as the last vid which is simply the crown reaction right before the encore, but the vids in the middle should only be watched for the visuals as the sound is just terrible. Sorry.

Yet another edit: I forgot to mention that Danielle and I, in search of good food at 11:45pm, stopped by the Bootlegger Bistro on S. Las Vegas Blvd. Five minutes after we walked in, Carrot Top came in and walked right past our table. The veal Saltimbocca was AWESOME!!! Try it if you're ever out that way.

Who is Motzart?

Yes, that's a very good question! Who, or what, exactly is Motzart?? Is it something you get when you cross applesauce with a painting? Please tell us Mr. Jeopardy dude from the University of Michigan.

Full Circle

I took a big chance in my life, resigning a good college gig to move out west.

I toiled for months taking classes at dealer's school while commuting from Ohio to Detroit.

I suffered a few months of unemployment in preparation for my big move.

Chris and I were almost frozen solid on our trip out to Nevada.

We spent even more time in dealer's school while still not working.

I suffered through two months of breaking in at a complete s**thole of a place dealing $1 blackjack and $1 craps!

I spent 10 months at a good place, making very little money while working about 15-20 hours per week, hoping to someday become full time.

I was laid off from the good place and spent another 2 months at an equally s**tty place as my break-in joint.

I endured 3 interviews/auditions and an entire week of orientation to get into a Strip property where tips are still much less than the aforementioned good place.

And it's all been worth it............because............last night...........for the very first time.........I was asked to deal...........

THE BIG SIX WHEEL!!!!!

The picture obviously isn't of the big wheel at my casino. Let me tell you, I have never been more depressed about the state of man than now, after dealing two total hours worth on the Big Freakin' Wheel! Actually, I never really had many players, but during those two sessions, I heard the following quotes coming out of people's mouths:

Drunk Lady #1: How do you play this?

-Rob explains-

Drunk Lady #1: Uh, I still don't really get it, but I'll try!


Dude #1: I'm putting my last $5 on the 'one'.

Dude#2: Bro, that's a sucker bet, put it on the 'five' or 'ten' instead!


Drunk Lady #2: Uh, it's a $2 minimum bet on any bet? I thought I could just bet $1 on the 'one' and $1 on the 'two'.

Rob: Nope, you'd have to bet $4 total to do that.

Drunk Lady #2: Oh, then just give me my money back then.
-She expected me to be able to reach back into the drop box somehow and magically bring back her ten dollar bill. When I pointed her toward the cage, she was visibly annoyed.


Random Guy #1: Where can I find a pool table around here?

Rob: Dude, its the Strip. I really don't know!


Random Guy #2: Where's a good techno club around here?

Rob: I don't know.


Random Guy #3: Where's a Subway around here?
-I politely told him where to find one.


Random Guy #4 (at 12:30am): Where are some good shows around here?

Rob: Well there's the 2nd City show at the Flamingo, which I've always liked. You can also check out George Wallace there and I've always had a good time at the Improv at Harrah's.

Random Guy #4: Cool, where can I go get tickets?

Rob: Well, the ticket offices are obviously closed, but if you want to see one tomorrow night, I'd get to the ticket office as early as you can in the morning.

Random Guy #4: Oh, you mean they don't play tonight. We wanna see one tonight!!

Rob (to himself): It's almost 1 o'clock in the f**cking morning jackass!! Are you kidding me!!

Rob (out loud): You're out of luck man. They don't play at 1am.


Honestly, most Let It Ride players just kind of sit there and don't talk (unless they're bitching about their lousy cards). Apparently, the Big Freakin' Six Wheel players are exactly like Let It Ride players, but who also say what is on their "mind". They should also replace the Big Wheel with a simple information desk, because that's what I was for most of those 2 hours. The quotes above didn't include the multiple times I directed people to the bathroom, the casino eateries, the casino bars, and my all-time favorite question, "Uh, what casino am I in again?". I got that one about a half-dozen times!

Oh well, my other two games were 3-card poker and a $10 blackjack shoe game, so the shift went relatively quickly. Now I have two full days off to try to catch up on some laundry, rock out with Rush, and meet up with Danielle's parents for a 2nd time on Sunday for a Mother's Day lunch. I don't know how well that will go though seeing as how we're meeting them at a time which is normally smack dab in the middle of the night for me! We'll see.

Testosterock!

One of the great things about living in Vegas is that, sooner or later, every single band with a North American tour will eventually make its way out here to Sin City! Such is the case with Rush's 2007/2008 Snakes and Arrows tour. This Saturday night....Mandalay Bay Events Center.....Section 207 row K.....Danielle and I will be there!!!

Mikey has mentioned in the past that the downside of seeing concerts in Vegas is that they're always way overpriced compared to other parts of the country. That may be the case, but I have extremely high expectations of this show and thus, have invested the equivalent to an entire night's worth of tips for the ticket. In 2002, I saw The Who live in Columbus, Ohio (with Robert Plant leading in) and was completely blown away! A couple years later I saw Yes live in the Palace of Auburn Hills and was also amazed beyond belief. Last year at the MGM Garden Arena I saw Roger Waters live as he and his band played, among other things, the ENTIRE Dark Side of the Moon album from beginning to end! I was awestruck!!! Before each of these three performances I had a nagging worry in the back of my head that because all of these guys are getting up there in age, they might not put on the best of live performances anymore. That thought simply hasn't entered my mind with this Saturday's Rush show. I think I'm done with underestimating the show these "old-timers" can put on and thus, have very high expectations. I don't think my night of tips will go to waste.

Now I must add a disclaimer and say that I don't even own one Rush album. I definitely wouldn't call myself a big fan of the band, but like that Yes show did for me, I'll probably be a way bigger fan come Sunday morning. Before I laid down the cash and bought the ticket, I scoured the internet for reviews of the current tour and haven't found one damn bad or mediocre review yet! During my research, I came across the new vocabulary word that I made the title of this blog post. Pretty cool, eh?

So if anyone out there reading this has been to live Rush concerts in the past, or has actually been to one of the Snakes and Arrows shows, let me know what I can expect. I really hope its a blast!

Fett's Vette

Nerd Rap! If you have 6 minutes to kill, try out this youtube video. It helps if you're a big Star Wars geek! It's got a real catchy tune though. It's also edited like crazy (which explains the appearance of the Bonanza theme song), so it's almost suitable for the office. I have a feeling Javier will like this video.



And if you happen to like that remix version, here is the original by MC Chris. It's NOT edited so it's definitely NOT suitable for the office.



If you like it, try out some other stuff by MC Chris at his web site.

Let It Die!

"Oh Boy!!! Rob's gonna talk about my favorite game, Let it Ride!!!"

Okay, I am now on a mission to convince as many people as humanly possible to completely avoid the Let It Ride table game at their favorite casino. To summarize my stance on Let It Ride, do NOT PLAY IT! Let It Ride is probably the worst game in the casino to play, with the highest house edge of just about any table game. Play blackjack, play craps, play roulette, video poker or pai gow. Just don't, under any circumstances, play Let It Ride! All dealers HATE dealing it! It's an extremely slow game, which doesn't generate many tips. It has such a high house edge that its almost impossible to win, which means people won't tip. People who play it are the lowest of the morons who enter the casino and, I guess, are the people who can't figure the finer points of "hit" and "stay" in blackjack. So a slow game + high house edge + douchebag players = NO TIPS! If 7 people are playing at my table, 6 are losing their asses and the 7th probably hit something big at some point, but will probably lose it all back sooner or later anyway.

The one thing that I just can't figure out is why this horrible game is so damn popular!!!! During my shift last night, I was on the 3-card poker/let it ride/$10 blackjack string. I stood dead for most of my time on the 3-card table, I dealt to mainly ONE guy at the blackjack table, but the Let It Ride table was completely full of nitwits just slowly, and very annoyingly, grinding their money into oblivion.

"Hmmmmm, is that a Let it Ride table over there?"

Before anyone tries to point out that the dealers aren't making many tips on this game because of their negative attitude, just stop and think how much you are willing to tip when you are losing your ass. Dealers know that losing players don't tip very often, and since nothing but losers play this game, the tips magically do not come in!

Before going any further, please think about the most popular side bet on the table which involves putting a dollar chip on the lighted area above the bets. At my casino, I hit a button that lights up the circles that have bets on them (and ALL of them ALWAYS have bets on them), and then I TAKE THE DOLLAR CHIPS AND LOCK THEM UP! What other game in the entire casino LOCKS UP YOUR MONEY BEFORE ANY DAMN CARDS ARE DEALT! The casino is basically saying, "hey dumbass, you just put a buck on a bet with a 23% house edge! We might as well take it right away, because you can pretty much kiss it goodbye anyway!"

If I had to pick the one main annoyance to this game, its the lack of "good hands" that can be dealt to the player to start the game. To win ANY money at all, you need at least a pair of tens at the end of the hand. But of course, every player expects at least a pair of tens on the initial deal (at least every other hand or so), and will begin to complain CONSTANTLY if a few hands go by without getting a monster dealt to them. "Come on Rob, you need to get me some good cards!" "Rob, you're not being very nice to me." "Geez Rob, you don't want me to be here very long do you!" "Son of a bitch these cards suck!"

Quick math! There are 22,100 possible variations of the three cards dealt to you. 20,492 of those variations do NOT include a high pair or three cards to a royal flush. Now knowing this, would you be surprised to be consistently getting s**t cards over and over again?

"Oh man! I just lost all my money at the Let it Ride table again. But that old, unshaven smelly guy next to me said he won 10 grand last year playing Let it Ride. So it must be true, and it'll happen to me too if I play long enough!"

-The Let It Ride tables are ALWAYS full!
-The dollar side bet that "lights up" has a 23% house edge on it.
-A craps table could be sitting dead for half the night, the Let It Ride table will loaded up with simpletons (yes, I've hit the thesaurus at this point).
-Blackjack has an almost even house edge if played correctly.
-Let It Ride has a 3.5% overall house edge if played perfectly by its basic strategy (guess how many typical Let it Ride players play perfect basic strategy).

If you doubt any of this, please feel free to visit the following web sites and do some research of your own:

Wizard of Odds Let it Ride

Wizard of Odds Let it Ride appendix

Quotables

When I first started this blog, its sole purpose was to just keep my friends up-to-date on the happenings with me out here in Vegas. I figured I'd get about 10 regular readers per day, being all of my friends back home and that's it. So to completely pick out those chosen few back in Ohio, I offer these quotes that only they will understand! Enjoy the flashback friends, and please add the ones that I've forgotten.

Random Party Guy: Hey! What ja drinkin’??

Random Party Girl: Uh, Matt. You better go help your friend!
Matt: Which one!?!?

Corey: I’m like Massachusetts, I refuse to puke!

Random Party Guy: Uh, it would probably be a good idea to NOT eat anything that’s cooked in this apartment!

Mike: The grill tipped over and the deck was like, sssspriccczzzzzeeeeeeaaaa! Holy God!

Sean: Hey Corey, don’t take a full swing!
Corey: What?
WaBamm!!!!
Mike: Holy God!

John: Might as well bring out Gus the Kicking Mule!

Rob: Michele’s chip dip is like crack! The first taste is free.

Matt: Uh Rob, I know she’s hot, but I’ve seen dinner buffets that are smarter than that chick! And I’m not talking about those fancy buffets that have soup!

Rob: Uh John, I don’t seem to be wearing any pants.

Random Redneck at 2am in the middle of West Virginia at a highway rest area: I pissed on Dale Earnhardt’s Car!!

John: Hello, Gumby’s Pizza? May I speak to Pokey please?

RA: Tony, could you please come get your roommate? He’s sleeping on the lobby’s heater!

Brutus: Denied!!!

Gil: Wow, she’s hotter than sliced bread!

Mike while falling down the ice covered stairs: Bam! Bam! Bam! Bam! Bam! I’m okay, don’t worry about m.., Bam! Bam! Bam! Bam! Bam!

Mike: She just stood there with boobs akimbo!

Random Illinois Fan: Hey Spielman! Come shotgun a beer with us!!

Michelle: O-H!!
Guys on Porch: Show us your tits!!

Matt: Always remember. Whenever you’re at White Castle….don’t….eat 20.…of anything!

An Actual Weekend!

I'm in the middle of my first actual weekend in a LONG time. I was scheduled Monday through Thursday last week with an "on-call" Friday. Since I was never called, I have now had Friday, Saturday and Sunday off before going back to work Monday night!

Like I mentioned in my previous post, I had hoped they'd call me in on Friday night since I could use the extra money these days. The tokes at my current place averaged well over $100/day in March, but by the time I started, they had plummeted back to around $80 during the week, which is all I've worked so far. Always looking for the silver lining though, its WAY better dealing at my current place than the s**thole on Boulder Highway for the exact same pay!

I've spent most of the weekend with Danielle, since she has a somewhat normal schedule during the week and its basically the first time we've spent a weekend together. Friday night was pretty uneventful due to the fact that I couldn't really "go out" with her until later in the evening after the chance of being called into work passed by. We just had dinner at her place and played some board games. Saturday night was a little more fun. I had some major cravings for some chicken wings for some odd reason, so I dragged her to Buffalo Wild Wings for dinner (12 boneless, 1/2 garlic parmesian and 1/2 Asian zing) and some beer.

Afterwards, Danielle had the great idea of heading over to Green Valley Ranch and putting some money though the machines. Uh, not the machines you're thinking of........these machines!!!

Sure, you can claim that its a lame way to spend a Saturday night, but that Galaga machine (yes, there was an actual original Galaga game) was WAY more fun than any slot machine, and much cheaper on the wallet as well! Danielle was crowned the Galaga queen while I bested her in a heated skee-ball tournament! In all, we walked out of GVR having spent $6. Not a bad price for an hour of entertainment!

After reliving some childhood memories, it was back to the apartment to watch Lost (which I had DVR'd) and another board game which she had resurrected out of her parents closet. It looked to be pretty old and its a Parker Brothers game that I had never heard of before called Option. Anyone out there familiar with it?? The instructions had long been lost, but it was basically like Scrabble, but the game pieces had two letters on each, both with a different color. It was interesting, but I think I still prefer the old standby, Scrabble. And in case you're wondering, I can lay claim to being the current Option champion, even after allowing Danielle to play the word "soden", which according to dictionary.com, is only a word in Slovenia!!! :-)



Sunday doesn't really hold any big plans. I was so damn tired after the work-week last week and Danielle had to remind me that I had basically gone from the funeral weekend, to flying back Monday and working THAT NIGHT through Thursday with very little sleep overall. So Sunday will probably see just some lounging around once again, hopefully catching some Stanley Cup playoffs if any are on. Go Wings! Go Penguins!

The Dolly Parton Shift

For the past couple of days, I've been back in the old 9-5 swing of things at work. The problem is that it's the wrong 9-5! It seems the majority of the shifts I've been getting at the new Strip place have me punching in at 9pm and driving home after the sun makes an appearance over the mountains. That is going to take a lot of getting used to.

The trouble is that I'm so tired once I get home that I just go right to bed. However, for some damn reason, my body has decided that I shouldn't get more than 6 hours of sleep when I do this (usually more like 5), so that once it comes time to actually get ready for work later in the night, I better have gotten a nap in or I'm in big trouble!

Honestly, I'm not even sure why they schedule 9-5'ers. Fortunately, it doesn't seem like this place ever sends people home against their will. Unfortunately, that usually means that come 3-4am when most of the graveyard dealers arrive, they have way too many dealers for a casino that slowly becomes "dead". Last night was a great example in why they should probably eliminate the 9-5 swing shifters. I went on break at 3:20am and came back at 3:40am. My dice table had long been closed up, so basically I just arrive at the podium and wait for them to assign me a table. Since we had too many dealers at that point, back on break I went!! So I chilled in the break room for another 20 minutes and came back at 4am. Initially, they told me to "muck" on the roulette table, but it was a jammed up table for some reason and since I don't deal roulette and know zero of the payoffs, I wasn't much help as a "mucker". So after about a minute, I get tapped out and told to GO BACK ON BREAK! Yep, that would have essentially made an entire hour-long break. So instead of heading back to the break room, I just found the other (less busy) roulette table and mucked over there for 20 minutes. After that 20 minute stint of barely working while chatting with the other dealer, they sent me to a single-deck blackjack table for all of 20 minutes, gave me the early push at 4:40am, and home I went. So in case you weren't keeping track, I "worked" for exactly 40 minutes of my last 2 hours of my shift, not including the 20 minute vacation I took as a mucker on the semi-dead roulette table.

I don't want to complain about the 9-5 shift too much though. It's actually kind of nice going dead around 2-3am and not having much to do. I guess I could put myself on the Early Out (EO) list and get voluntarily sent home a couple of hours early, but what's the point? If any of you read Mikey's blog, you know that as soon as his casino grows dead at night, he usually gets his EO request and comes home, in some cases, 3 hours or more early. I never understood why he does this when I first started but figured I would just get to be the same way after dealing for a while. Well, its been well over a year since I started dealing, and I still don't feel the need to take EO at night. I guess its just something we're polar opposites on.

Don't get me wrong, the EO list isn't barren on a nightly basis as many fellow swing shifters sign up for it at at my place. However, the huge majority of those on the EO list are people who either have family obligations, people who have a 2nd part-time job, or both. The way I see it, why would I work my ass off at a jammed up dice table for the first 5 hours of my shift (which happened last night) just to get sent home as soon as things become slow and I can relax a little. I get paid the same either way. Even on days when the tips aren't all that great (let's take $80 for example), if you add the tips to the minimum wage base pay, that's still around $17 an hour I'm making during every hour of my shift, busy or not. I think if you offered almost anyone $17 an hour to take breaks every 20 minutes and just stand around people-watching or watching the bar TVs, they'd take it! Besides, what am I going to do after getting home early at 2am? Nothing that would warrant giving up $50 in pay for, I'm sure.

Another thing I've tried to take advantage of at my new place is the kick-ass employee dining room (EDR). Unlike my previous 2 jobs in Henderson and on Boulder Highway, the EDR at my current place actually has some very tasty offerings. If I get in there during lunch/dinner time, it has a meat carving station, which is replaced by a made-to-order omelette station in the morning. The trouble is that it is a country mile from my table games area because it is shared with the casino next door. So I usually get to work early, stuff my face, work my 8 hour shift and then re-commence with the aforementioned face-stuffing after work. In doing this, I almost never touch ANYTHING in my fridge/cupboards during work-days, which obviously cuts my grocery budget down dramatically!

Okay, enough rambling. I work the 9-5 again tonight, starting on dice, and then I'm on-call for Friday night. I do hope they call me in because the weekend shifts are usually much better for tokes than weekdays. I just hope I can hone my nap-taking skills a little.